Her words stir us to devote as much of ourselves to love, to loving our partners, our bodies, our pasts, our parents, as we do our careers and our independence. Amor que la mayoría de veces se confunde con sexo y más exactamente con una lucha por el poder en el terreno sexual. Antipatriarchal thinking, which assumes that both women and men are equally capable of learning how to love, is the only foundation on which to construct sustained, meaningful, mutual love.

And the outcome of that work is often the recognition that they would rather be alone than remain in unsatisfying partnerships. The voice of bell hooks rings with moral rectitude, but it is also a voice that is full of kindness, openness, and wholehearted forgiveness. hooks says that most women only start to really excel at the art of love in midlife, and this has been my experience; only now am I really learning to love myself, and to approach all relationships with an open heart and a deep commitment to acting at all times with care, respect, and responsibility. Celebrated as one of our nation's leading public intellectual by The Atlantic Monthly, as well as one of Utne Reader's "100 Visionaries Who Could Change Your Life," she is a charismatic speaker who divides her time among teaching, writing, and lecturing around the world.i loved how she challenged the idea that women innately have more capacity for emotion and are naturally more capable of giving love than men and how this idea influences our relationships and society (and allows us to accept men who are emotionally withholding). kitabın kendisine gelirsek, ben sevgi arayışı, sevginin ne olduğu/olmadığı, neden inatla bu kadar önemli olduğu konusunda bu kadar düşünmemiştim. Circles of love, which are intimate relationships that allow for sexual intercourse between more than one partner, may also be favorable to women in the progressive era. My one edit is that her book exists in this binary, gendered world, and seems to exclude trans and nonbinary people.

I admit that only once I started focusing on prioritizing and improving myself did I attract the right person into my life. We don’t share your credit card details with third-party sellers, and we don’t sell your information to others. It is recommended reading for anyone who is trying to balance black feminism with romantic relationships. It is, however, the ideal choice for women who have always silently wondered why intimacy and true fulfillment appear to be more fantasies than realities.Communion also explores the dimension between gender and sexuality when it comes to love and nurturing.

she empowered women to take accountability and to put in the work to find and create meaningful, mutual love.

According to her “ Mothers are simultaneously abusive and caregiving -that leads us to idealize them and to minimize the traumatic implications of their abusive behavior. Yakın zamana kadar kim olduğumuzu ve erkekler kadar iyi olabileceğimizi anlatmaya çalışırken onların bize verdikleri kalıplara uymaya çalıştık. This misinformation about the nature of love has helped to further the politics of domination, particularly male domination of women.

And I’m sure bell hooks herself would disagree with this attitude, and she did briefly mention that lesbian relationships can lack meaningful love, but I still came away with the impression of “gay people are magic! I found again and again that if I talked openly about the importance of giving and receiving love in my life, especially about my desire to have a partner, there feelings were ridiculed or mocked. I think this book was supposed to inspire me, but it just made me sort of sad/convinced if I ever do experience Hook's definition of love, I'll have to at least be 40.pg, 22) And her private rebellion, with the decision to further her education at Stanford University, against her fathers wish; “ I defied the will of the father. For some reason, it's associated with having "issues," and I fucking hate that, because in actuality it's one of the most healing practices out there, and one of the safest environments in which to explore power dynamics and kinks. There’s so much here and during my slow read of this book, I found myself over and over again nodding my head in agreement regarding the concepts surrounding the ways that patriarchy and base-level feminism has shaped my life and the lives of people I know. By challenging sexist ways of thinking about the body, feminism offered new standards of beauty, telling us plump bodies were luscious and big bellies sublime, that hair hanging under our arms and covering our legs was alluring.