While he can't claim to know your experience and your child, he is pretty bang on with his analogy of the teen boy. As school starts up again it’s important to mention the key study skills which will put your child in the best position to succeed this academic year. There is always one idea that you had not considered, or a new vocabulary you needed to have conversations with your teen son. It’s a confusing and challenging world out there, and our adolescents need our help to learn to navigate it.

If you do everything for your child, and don't let him fail, he will stop doing anything, because 1.If you’re thinking “well he doesn’t seem very stressed by it, that’s half the problem”, he is probably blocking it all out and hoping it will go away. I may be interpreting certain actions incorrectly as well as taking things personally when they don’t have anything to do with me as a parent. Who refuses to take responsibility for his schoolwork unless you trawl through his bag to make sure it gets done. However, as I was reading the introduction, I got already convinced that this book is going to be a great tool for me.

He seems to think what they need is more work they’ll never do to figure out why they’re not doing work. Like many parents, I was shocked by recent revelations about sexual violence and harassment in UK schools. He’s Not Lazy will help you become your son’s ally, as he assumes greater self-confidence and becomes more self-reliant.

Honestly, I never thought that having the amazing opportunity of witnessing the transition of my son becoming an adult was going to drive me crazy, to make me doubt myself in one year more than I have during my whole life, to make me want to give up, run away and hide for the next 10 years. Parents can help by giving chart outline of steps and strategies but let them fill it in after one or two helping them. He’s NOT trying hard, not seemingly concerned about grades or school, in fact they might describe him as ‘barely motivated’, or even ‘lazy’. If you name a consequence, be prepared to enforce it, regardless of your son's complaints and threats.

As the former Director of Outpatient Services at Newark Beth Israel Hospital and Associate Director at Family Connections, a mental health agency, he has supervised and trained numerous clinicians in family and child therapy. I could clearly identify with the explanations of the author in the causes of underachievement in teenage boys. The central premise of He’s Not Lazy is that what looks like laziness, lack of self-discipline and lack of motivation on the outside is actually a deep-rooted ambivalence about trying his hardest that springs from hidden issues like insecurity and fear of failure.The advice given might not work for every situation, but as a parent who also speaks to a lot of other parents, it carries validity for some situations. It’s a lot of nice thoughts but my child is failing out of high school and letting him isn’t really an option. Learning to be independent is soooo important but many parents over control thereby stunting that natural growth. Good advice about taking a step back and giving your son room to fail as a means of growing toward independence. I enjoyed the audio version but also purchased the ebook so I can highlight it on my phone and a hard-copy in hopes that I can sneak it into my husband's TBRs.